This post is going to be really personal, very personal. But I am going to pour it all out because, for the first time, it does feel like I can pour out all my emotions without being exactly burdening anybody by talking to them personally. I’ve been feeling really stressed of late. I have even tried to do a few things like I don’t normally do like sleeping early, eating breakfast (started this week), go out. But none of them has worked yet.
The past few weeks have been crazy for me. Really crazy. I’ve had to sleep late, wake up early, skip meals, think even in my dream, cry, attend to people and more. So here’s a list of the things that have stressed me out the most in the past few weeks.
A. Too Many Chats
Early this year, I made a post saying that I wanted to keep in touch with friends more often and truth be told, I have been trying. It just isn’t exactly working out the way I want. I decided to keep in touch more via social media (Whatsapp, especially) since I am almost always online. But you see, I have been too stressed out keeping up with chats. A few days ago, a friend of mine mentioned that I had responded to his message on Whatsapp late (a day after) and I had to explain to him that I actually do not like chatting. Strange, right? It exhausts me having to chat with so many people all at the same time about different topics. Plus, some of the time, I am not even in the right frame of mind to chat and then when I do not reply, someone decides to term me as proud. Chats have stressed me out so much. Many times, the only thing I want to do update statuses and be in my closet. Nothing too draining like responding to chats.
B. The Lagos Series Project
Earlier this month, I started working on a project called “The Lagos Series” (I’d talk about this in a post later) and to be really honest, thinking and planning for it alone has stressed the life out of me. There’s the need to want to put all plans in place and ensure nothing flops. There’s the feeling of knowing it’s not going to flop but not knowing the next steps to take. I’m sick, really. And with the amount of stress I have faced lately, I honestly wonder why I haven’t fallen ill yet. I have only lost a lot of weight. I also have not been able to blog regularly and #FreshGradTales has been lagging because it is a lot of work on its own. I know this one is just because I’m just starting anyway and it would make a lot more sense and be less stressful with time.
Okay. I won’t say I have exactly been broke but the responsibilities have been so overwhelming. Many times, I am grateful that I have a job because, with it, I can feed myself daily, buy stuff I want with my money and not have to depend on anybody (not even my parents for that). But you know that saying about money never being enough, right? Yeah, the more you earn, the more responsibilities come in. And the fact that I have had to handle key things like the school fees of someone close to me monthly (well asides other responsibilities) for the past three months isn’t telling well on me. Sometimes, I want to go crazy. Sometimes I feel like I want to stay away from the world for a whole month. Sometimes I feel like I need a break. Sometimes, I cry. I hate not having money, or rather, not having enough. And I hate asking people for money (even if you’re a family member) so I have to keep thinking of extra ways to get money so I can pay for what I want or need to pay for.
These are all the things that have been stressing me anyhow. Lol. Please, don’t pity me. I honestly do not like being pitied. I know this phase will be over soon but I really am looking forward to when I will eventually get a P.A to help me respond to my numerous messages (Looooooooool. I’m kidding o); when The Lagos Series project would eventually show the success it already is; and when I’ll start earning much more money than my responsibilities.
Just before you leave, kindly like my page on Facebook and follow on IG:
Facebook: The Lagos Series
You could also join the Facebook community I created for my Lagos project here: http://facebook.com/groups/mylagosstory
Thank you for joining us today on #FreshGradTales. In this episode, I have Nze Chidinma Sandra. She is a graduate of the Ekiti State University, Ado-Ekiti and she studied Crop Horticulture and Landscape Design. Sandra would like to describe herself as one who enjoys doing a lot of things. Do enjoy her interview!
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DID YOU ENJOY SANDRA’S INTERVIEW? READ INTERVIEWS OF OTHER FRESH GRADUATES HERE >>>> #FreshGradTales
#FreshGradTales is a series of interviews for fresh graduates from ALL universities in Nigeria. This initiative aims at hearing and sharing the stories, struggles, achievements and experiences of fresh Nigerian graduates. We do believe everyone has a unique story that someone somewhere would love to read and benefit from reading as well.
If you are a fresh university graduate and would love to share your #FreshGradTales, Orifunke would be glad to hear from you on [email protected]
Hello. It’s great to have you here. Thank you for stopping by. In this listicle, I’m going to be sharing with you three things that your friends who blog want but may not tell you. If you have friends or relatives who blog, I am sure they’d appreciate if you did any of this for them.
Some time last year, I attended a Bloggers’ hangout in Lagos. First of its kind that I’d be attending, it was a gamechanger for me. I met with other bloggers and it felt good to know that I wasn’t alone. I mean, there were other people who faced the issues I face (and have been facing) and there were others who had scaled through those same issues. The hangout made me realize though that there are things every blogger wants (or needs). They may/may not tell you (depending on how shy they are) but they nonetheless need it. So I did a list of these things. You can thank me later by doing any of them. Lol
1. They need you to READ their posts.
Many bloggers write so people can read what they write. What’s the essence of spending hours on one post if nobody gets to read them? It’s particularly painful when they churn out good content that stays unread by even people they call their friends. I make it quite a duty to read stuff from my friends. Not because I always feel like but because I know friendship means staying up to date with what they do. I can’t imagine having a friend or family member who has access to the internet, knows I blog and still doesn’t read what I write. I mean, what’s the point bruh? Sometimes they don’t even have to be people I know personally. As long as they’re doing something good, I root for them, I read their work. I listen to their music. I buy their stuff. You know, all for the support culture.
2. They want you to give them FEEDBACK
Man, I do not think there’s any blogger who doesn’t like feedback, especially when it comes as a comment on their posts. See, it is great to read stuff from your friends who are bloggers on a consistent basis but it is not enough. I have had people meet me offline and tell me they follow my blog posts and random posts on Facebook and how they love them. This show of “silent patriotism” is well enough to “humble” you (if the person is just a random reader and not your friend). I appreciate when someone tells me they’ve been following my stuff quite all right but to be honest, if it’s a friend, I don’t absolutely do.
Now this is important because as a blogger, there are times you may want to give up or stay encouraged. And all you need is an encouraging comment from a friend to bring you back on your feet again. This happens to me a lot of times so I can relate.
Feedback doesn’t need to be “sweet” to the hearing every time, however. Reasonable bloggers are open to, and will appreciate constructive criticism when the need arises. And of course, a good blogger always wants to know what they can do for better blogging. So if you think there’s something your friend can do for better resuls, don’t hesitate to tell them. It makes them know that you do support them and that they can trust your judgment anytime anyday.
3. They want you to SHARE their posts
A couple of months ago, I stumbled on a post by a leader in my local church who’d shared a link to one of my posts. Imagine the gratitude in my heart when I saw that someone thought my post worthy enough to share. And he wasn’t even a friend sef.
Every time I also post, I have a few people who do well to share what I have posted on their personal walls and stories. And that means the world to me, I tell you.
If you have a friend who blogs and you know they churn out good stuff, they’d appreciate it if you could share it with your network. It helps them know that they’re doing something right and it encourages them to want to keep at it. Remember, every blogger wants readers.
I trust this has opened your eyes. Lol. So what do you think? Let me know in the comments. Are you a blogger? Did I miss out on anything else? Let me know in the comments as well. Thank you for reading!