Orifunke Lawal

Too often, I read stories of ladies who fall prey to guys who break off their relationships in the most inconsiderate manner.  What usually makes it very painful is that on most occasions, the relationship would have lasted more than 3 or 4 years. And no, usually, this is not a simple relationship but one where a ring has been involved. So imagine the pain the lady goes through when it dawns on her that she has wasted time, emotions and opportunities she had for other potential suitors to come into the picture. 

I strongly feel this is something that can be avoided a lot of times by ladies and I’ll be sharing tips on how to know if your fiancé is serious about marrying you or if he just put the ring on your finger till further notice. 

1. He never says anything about you both starting marriage preparations after putting the ring on your finger.

I believe that proposing to a lady means that you see her marrying her really soon, say in one or two years. It’s not a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship that you’re still trying to figure out. However if he keeps mute after you’ve said yes and doesn’t bring it up again at all, then you should raise your eyebrows. Unless he has amnesia and has forgotten he proposed to you. 

2. He tries to avoid any talks about marriage with you. 
If after he’s proposed he starts to avoid marriage talks with you or starts to postpone the discussion, then it could be time to rethink. Many guys give ladies engagement rings not because they’re ready to get married to them but because they’re scared of someone else taking her. In some cases, they’re not even sure if they’ll eventually marry her. If your man finds a way to change the subject when marriage comes up, take a cue and start thinking of exit routes. Or for starters, take the ring off your finger first of all. 

3. He actually talks marriage with you but never seems ready. 

I understand the place of your man having everything in place before getting married. However, if for three, four, five years or more, he’s still trying to fix something here and there, you just may have to start thinking of leaving. If he knew he wasn’t ready for it very soon, I don’t think he should have proposed to you yet. There’s nothing bad in waiting for his life to be in order but if it’s taking too long then it’s not too good, baby. 
Please understand that the above conditions only hold for relationships where a ring is already involved. A relationship where the guy hasn’t proposed would definitely have different (even though slight) conditions. 
So, what did I miss out on? How can a lady know if the guy is really serious or if she’s just a lord (or lady) of the rings? 
P.S: Opinions and constructive criticism are welcome!